With deep regret I dispose of my favorite tube of lip-balm.  It’s a holiday issue, cinnamon flavored moisturizing stick that I bought from Avon a couple of years ago.  I should have thrown it away a long time ago, after the first accident, but I really liked the flavor as well as the red tinted, soft lips it provided.

 

But the thing’s just more trouble than it’s worth.

 

With deep regret I dispose of my favorite tube of lip-balm.  It’s a holiday issue, cinnamon flavored moisturizing stick that I bought from Avon a couple of years ago.  I should have thrown it away a long time ago, after the first accident, but I really liked the flavor as well as the red tinted, soft lips it provided.

 

But the thing’s just more trouble than it’s worth.

 

A while back, we were meeting some friends at a new house they had purchased as a ‘flip’ investment.  My lip-balm was resting in it usual spot in the center console of the van .  I didn’t notice when Chuck reached for it and slathered his lips.

 

You know how things happen in 3’s?  Well, the three consecutive thoughts that ran though my mind as he turned to look at me were:  “Oh, no!  Chuck’s accidentally shaved off his lips,” followed by, “Oh no!  Chuck’s been leading a double life and is now about to confess, right here before our friends,” then, “What?  Has Chuck decided to change careers again and is now going to be sidekick to Limpy, the balloon sculpturing clown at Fudrucker’s?”

 

“What,” he asked, in response to my facial expression, “don’t tell me this stuff is tinted.”  He then took a closer look at the deep, red wax stick he’d just spread (and none too neatly) across his lips.

 

I dug out some tissue, and he was able to clean his lips off enough so that they could pass for being severely chapped.  Then, of course, we had a good laugh.

 

I’m not laughing today, though.  I must have left the tube in one of my pockets because when I started folding he laundry (light load, of course) I noticed almost every garment was pocked with red.

 

My first thought was that I was bleeding.  My second thought was that Christopher had left a tube of paint in his pants pocket.  My third thought was that another load of laundry, including one of Chuck’s brand-new polo shirts is ruined.

 

Never once did I imagine it was my beloved red-tinted-cinnamon-Avon-lip-balm.  But, there it was in the dryer, pristinely cleaned on the outside and completely melted on the inside. 

 

And I’ve switched to a new tube of colorless, odorless, and flavorless lip balm.